Message 36 – I’m Right Here

Jason lives. He’s right here. He’s always been here. I received that message from him clearly a few times this past week. It has helped me resurface easily from moments of deep pain, missing his physical presence, missing the adorable 17-year old that I used to share a house with and a life with, that used to help me relax, inspire me, and make me laugh. He was right here with me when I was listening to his music the other day, after cutting...

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Rebirth

When Jason died, I died. His funeral was my funeral, a celebration of his life and my life. My grieving has been a rebirth. It’s spring time and there is new life everywhere. The change in season has brought up some renewed grieving for me. April spring break reminds me of the awesome vacations Jason and I would take together to the southwest, getting up early with the excitement of flying in a plane together. He wore his camera like a...

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Letting Go of the Future

I’ve worked hard to let go of the past and be in the present. I overlooked one piece – the future. Jason and I had a 5-year plan in Ipswich:He was going to spread his adult wings and fly to his future. He’s done that, and I believe I’ve accepted his path. I was going to take off to a new destination outside New England. I didn’t know where I’d end up, but I looked forward to having Jason visit me wherever I was. Wow. That hit me...

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Passages

I’m experiencing many passages. Jason passed almost 8 months ago. He passed so much to me for which I am grateful. I’m in turn passing it on to others as I am called to do. I’m getting ready to pass my home to another. Our first interested buyer, a friend of a friend, reminded me of me five years ago, a single mom looking for the best home and arts-oriented school for her teens. Everything was in such an easy flow; I hadn’t even listed...

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