Back to Nature


Written during our visits to Earthaven in Asheville, NC and Anahata in Floyd, VA

I’m getting back to nature. Back to my nature.

(See dolphin picture at – We stayed with Laurel Song of Anahata; her home was alive with the colors of her art and furnishings.)

Living more primitively than I’m used to has brought up some challenges during the launch of our intentional community exploration. The heat wave, for example….I want to give up AC, but if I had been home at that time I’d have been turning that electricity-hogging machine on – because it’s there! This nature wonderland is raising my wonder. The more I stay with the experience without judgment (hard or bad or crazy, etc) the more I can tune in to the Source of this experience. Being one with nature is something I’ve always understood but haven’t experienced as deeply.

I’m humbled.

The young people (and older “ageless” people) who travel the country to be in Rainbow Gatherings know how to be at ease in the flow of nature. They thrive on the gentle chaos. I allow myself to feel what it would feel like to be these beautiful young hippies, at one with nature, at one with each other, not questioning what’s possible, not worrying about how they will be fed, not getting caught up in mainstream indoctrination. It feels really good. I allow that feeling to create my current reality. Before I know it I’m enjoying the sweat, the soiled clothes, the dirt under my nails, nature’s bathroom, and even offering my blood to the mosquitos in exchange for building tolerance and immunity to the itching (it’s working!).

I think about how much Jason would love hanging with these wild creative young people, so much at home with oneness. Then I remember how little he loved hanging with bugs and other outdoor discomforts, and laughed to myself about it. I shared a few tears with a few Anahata dwellers who were moved by Jason’s photography and music, and who totally got how creative and one-world-focused he was. They felt Jason’s presence and were grateful for having gotten to know him through me. We enjoyed playing music together, getting into the kind of creative flow Jason thrived on. Music is my nature.

When I was told about the Firefly primitive arts conference that many Earthaven folks were attending over the weekend, I caught myself with some prejudices about it being a wild hippy fest, focused on bad-mouthing the earth-destroying culture. I was humbled once again when I arrived to a well-organized, welcoming, and diverse group of workshop facilitators and participants. I immediately dropped any notion that I wouldn’t “fit in” and thoroughly enjoyed my time participating in workshops, cooling off in the lake, having brief (walk-by smiles and hugs) to longer communications with open-minded and educated folks like me (only different). The bio-gas talk was professionally done by a long-haired “chemistry geek” who was able to reach both scientist and farmer alike. I’m inspired to not only compost but to harvest methane from it for cooking – I recall being excited to see the larger scale methane generators at Rancho Margot in Costa Rica earlier this year.

There seems to be no limit to how much more we can get back to nature!

During our visit to Anahata, a small privately-owned community in Floyd, VA, we joined a community pot-luck and presentation event hosted by several organizations from all around the Appalachian mountains. I was inspired to experience the solidarity of the movement to end mountain-top removal by coal companies. Coming from New England, far from coal country, I felt ashamed that I never knew that this was happening, destroying mountains, watersheds, and communities even more quickly than before with these cost-savings techniques. The wonderful blend of positive political activism and one-world approach brought me hope that major change can happen when we focus on what we want and don’t get caught up in fear about what we don’t want. Floyd is a community evolved in sustainability as well as spiritual connection, to the earth and to all. Recognition that we all take responsibility for the capitalism (dependence on fossil fuels) that created the environmental issues around coal mining was touching and inspiring.

By reclaiming our own nature we can get our nature back.

I’m learning more about permaculture. I’m not into the details of it yet, but I’m getting the energy of it. It’s about our energetic connection, how our Source tunes into the Earth’s Source. It’s a wonderful bridge of eco-mindedness and spiritual focus. There’s even a famous holistic-health author living at Earthaven, Rudy Ballentine, who is finishing up his next book on the connection between Tantra and permaculture. That’s so cool; there is so much cool stuff happening in the Asheville area. I’m definitely looking for a community who is both focused on sustainability and spirituality. It’s not a primary focus right now at Earthaven, but the personal growth and spirituality focus is present and growing.

I was fascinated by the sign “The Light Center” posted on a dirt road in the middle of nowhere on a windy mountain road near Earthaven in Black Mountain, NC. I’m really getting how magical the mountains are here (the oldest range on the continent), and I figured this center must be doing some kind of research about the energy here. I was right. We stopped by at the lodge that rents out rooms at this natural retreat center and met a couple getting ready to have dinner. They welcomed us with beaming light. The man is one of the co-founders, now living in Atlanta, who hadn’t been here in 20 years. We heard the story of how this center was created, and got to know the son of the owner, Jay. We all became instant friends, co-evolutionaries in the study of vibrational medicine – light for them and sound for me. We made a date to do a sound healing in the meditation dome the next evening.

The energy in the Light Center dome is powerful and pure. The synergy of that energy with the sound coming from my instruments and voice was a high for all of us. Some powerful healings have taken place at this center, and we were honored to feel and contribute to that potential. We made a date to come back in the morning when the light meditation chamber was open. The meditation accompanied by beautiful music was 30 minutes long, sitting in comfortable cushion chairs in a circle, surrounded by light, one chakra at a time (ROYGBIV). Again, we were honored to be welcomed into this spiritual practice of our new friends. We have been invited to come and do sound healing again with them anytime. Another home away from home, reminding us that our home is Source.

I am very familiar with connecting with the light, with Source, with the “other side” that can assist with this connection. Jason is a direct channel for me, and I’m guessing he will always be one, along with music, meditation, tantra, intimate relationships, and other channels.

I watch as awareness of my beliefs surfaces….. Beliefs that I can’t handle hot weather, my back and hips aren’t made for sleeping on the ground, that I don’t know how to grow my own food, that I need a lot of space and quiet away from people, etc. I am watching myself let go of identities, ways I see myself and perceive others see me. I am feeling freer. Jason taught me by example and by questioning the indoctrination of this culture that I can free myself from standard and transparent beliefs. I have been enjoying, for perhaps the first time in my life, being with many people and feeling my own space, not needing as much physical space for myself. There is a feeling of non-separation, of one-ness with others who are on the same path. Conflicts arise and transparency and love dissolve them. We witnessed wonderful leadership and negotiation in the Anahata community and in our Network for New Culture gatherings.

Love always connects.

Jason is assisting me to be free. I feel more alive since his death because I am even more connected to Source, through my connection with him. I am feeling my inherent nature more, not clouded by limiting beliefs.

Jason is my greatest guide in my journey back to nature.

Back to my nature.